NCAA Football: Previewing This Weekend (Plus a Little Smack Talk)

It’s a put up or slither away type of weekend

by Chris Lowery, Contributing Writer

At some point in our lives we all fawn for the center of attention. Sometimes, it’s a celebrity wearing an outfit making Adam’s fig leaf look like a cloak, some guy wearing an affliction shirt and shouting “grenades” and “G-T-L”, or some kid lighting his cats tail on fire until the entire house smelled like a China Wall buffet.  (Don’t worry, Patches survived another eight years until he lost control of his bowels and started pissing on my 49er’s starter jacket.)

And if you’re a mid-major football player, such as Florida Atlantic’s defensive end, Cory Henry, you simply call out Alabama the week you play them.

Henry, realizing their game against the Tide would be as relevant as a pre-rehab Lindsay Lohan, took it upon himself to say things like, “They ain’t what people think…we got speed against them… you got speed you can win.”

I agree with “they ain’t what people think,” finding my support from the hair of ESPN’s Mel Kiper, who agreed that people are “overreacting” to Alabama right now. But c’mon Cory, you can say these things when you’re a cat-searing blogger or if your hair spits in the face of time. But, your comments are simply greeted with rolled eyes and a pissed off Barrett Jones, not with an admiration towards your Bond-ish self-confidence. A better play would’ve been to end the game with a sack and a couple knockdowns, at least then you wouldn’t be overshadowed by your own hubris.

Previewing the weekend:

Arkansas (1-a fricking terrible 2) hosts Rutgers (3-0): this game is about as non-enticing as they come. But Arkansas enters the game with a coach whose financial follies are now common knowledge. It’s being reported that Razorback coach, John L. Smith, is currently fighting for his monetary life in bankruptcy court. Apparently Smith has made some bad real estate investments to the tune of 25.7 million. Why his financial problems are of public importance, I don’t know. I mean I would hate for people to know I’m in credit card debt because of Smart TV’s and the lies of a dancer named Pepper. But maybe if the previous coach hadn’t displayed the shown the same weakness by going all Sons of Anarchy with a former Arkansas volleyball player, it wouldn’t be AS big of a deal. I guess it’s just too easy to kick the Hogs while they’re down. I’m doing it right now.

Oregon (3-0) hosts Arizona (3-0): After failing at Michigan, Rich Rodriguez has the Wildcats making some noise in the Pac-12 this year by being one win away from their 2011 win total. Well, making noise by Pac-12 standards, where high scoring offenses and 240 lb. linemen reign supreme. Nevertheless, this game presents itself as a measuring stick to the Wildcats against the Pac-12 elite. It’ll certainly be a fun game to watch. I’ll be posted up casually watching with some friends, randomly blurting out, “Dude, these guys play no defense,” after Darron Thomas breaks off his 3rd 40 plus yard scamper, certainly more entertaining than How I Met Your Mother reruns. I’m predicting Oregon will pull away at the end to the tune of 80-69.

Notre Dame (3-0) hosts Michigan (2-1): Notre Dames riding high after their thrashing of Michigan State. Michigan hasn’t been heard of since they were emasculated by Alabama. Michigan, under Denard Robinson, seems to magically find ways to pull out a win against the Irish. The Irish are trying to not be the recent Irish. Even though Michigan is certainly not the pre-season contenders the media painted them to be, they are still a solid team who won’t back down from the newfound bravado of the Irish. If the Irish win they certainly still won’t be among the elite in college football, but the momentum could thrust them to a 10-2 finish and a BCS bowl. And a loss could potentially leave themselves and the rest of the country wondering if they’re still not quite ready.

Florida State (3-0) hosts Clemson (3-0): This is the most important game of the week for a variety of reason. When Sammy Watkins and the Clemson Tigers step into Doak Campbell for this ACC showdown on Saturday, not only will conference title hopes be on the line but national title hopes as well.

(RELATED: Heading to the FSU game? Check out Fanzooloo’s Doak Campbell Stadium page)

It’s hard to believe a 1-loss ACC team will play in the title game over a 1-loss Big 10, Pac-12, or SEC school. Even though Clemson’s defense has been less than impressive over the past few years, the combination of Tahj Boyd and Sammy Watkins—a guy who would be on my fantasy team right now if he were eligible—are more than enough firepower to upset the ‘Noles and fuel an Iranian missile. Florida State has a chance, much like Notre Dame, to be “back” with a win. And Clemson has a chance to “arrive” with a win. Otherwise the hype surrounding either one could potentially be cast onto the dreaded “next year.”

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